30/06/07 : Jordan sprogs again

British glamour model Jordan has given birth to a "beautiful, stunning girl with massive eyes" according to her Neanderthal pop-flop husband Peter Andre.

Word on the size of the tot's mouth, nose and ears is still eagerly awaited.

The Insania crooner told journos outside the hospital: “My beautiful wife (aka Katie Price) has given birth to a beautiful, beautiful stunning girl with massive eyes. We’ve been blessed today. She’s really incredible.”

But Pete doesn't want the most unfortunate baby since David Banda to turn out like her slutty mother. He added: “I am going to be so protective, she is not going to be let out until she is 64.”

Anticipating the backlash against his tight wife’s Caesarean, Pete overstated: “Everything went smoothly. It was a planned Caesarean because doctors wanted her to come out — and who are we to argue with what they want? Katie overcame her fear of needles.

“We haven’t decided on a name yet because we want to see what she looks like over the next few days."

If she looks like any other baby, the poor bairn can expect to be named Beetroot, Baldy, or Monkey-bum.

Posted By Editor On 30/06/07

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